The empty room gradually moved away from the loneliness that began to approach again. The open windows were still unstoppable. The hot air and the me sitting on the ground were everything in the rental house.

After calming down, I regretted it a little, and now I am immersed in endless repentance. I can't help asking myself: Is it really correct to leave Borui and Zhang Yao in this extremely childish way?

She was already forced to deal with her and was exhausted by Dong Shuhan, but I just added a fire at this time.

If she would be annoyed by my behavior, I would be no different from the unforgivable sinner. If she would not be angry by my behavior, or even in her heart, she would not stir up a ripples, I would feel like I was a failure.

Contradictory and entangled.

Such anxiety and gains and losses have not appeared in me for a long time. The only time it has appeared was many years ago. I was just a boy who had just turned 18. At that time, Tong Xue and I started our first love.

First love, what a beautiful and innocent vocabulary?

But will it really be something people see from the surface? At least, it is not now. I feel like I have returned to many years ago and back to that innocent era, and are worried about the various psychological activities of my lover.

This is not what a twenty-seven-year-old man should look like.

"well"

After a long breath, I suddenly raised my hand. However, in fear of pain, I put it down and flipped my hand back. I was amused by my incompetent behavior.

"It's so fucking free."

After scolding myself in my hometown dialect, I stood up from the ground and felt like I was going crazy. If I didn’t go to talk to someone and numb myself with alcohol, what was waiting for me would be an abyss of extremely darkness.

I started to work my phone and called Du Cheng. For some reason, I didn't think about contacting Meng Yang, who was theoretically closer to me.

The phone was answered by Du Cheng soon, and the background was a little noisy. At this time, he must have just entered a bar and was about to start singing.

"What's wrong?" he asked to me loudly.

This method is very familiar and can relax my nerves that are tightened by me.

"No, I'm too boring."

"Yohe, it's rare, here is Houhai, come on."

"That's what you're waiting for."

I smiled, didn't say anything more, and ended the call.

Friends, when you need to be rescued, without any extra words, it is my luck to comfort your people with practical actions to meet friends like Du Cheng in the city of Beijing.

Maybe life is not too difficult for me?

Thinking of this, I put my cell phone in my pocket and the pack of cigarettes that only igniteed, and went out.

I closed the door heavily, and used more effort than when I came back because I was already tired of this rental house that was too big for me.

Houhai, ferry.

With intuition, I came here. If Du Cheng was not here, I would just contact me again, but I didn't seem to have to contact me anymore because I just went in and saw the man standing on the bar counter with a loose head and a denim half-sleeved man.

With an unruly dressed up, his right foot was stepping on the speaker with his Martin boots. He lowered his head slightly and made an listening look. The red men and green women who came to buy drunk turned into his most loyal fans and cheered happily.

He seems to be a man born for music. He will be transformed into his home court in any occasion and turn those who listen to music into his supporters.

I still remember the first time I met him, I was in the underground passage of Xidan. He plucked the strings hard, roaring hoarsely, and through the cheap microphone, it reached everyone's ears, tearing open people's souls in the most simple and direct way.

"It's really similar to that naive"

Just as I was feeling the mood, the band he cooperated with also ended the prelude. Du Cheng sat directly on the side of the platform, shook his head coquettishly, and swayed with the rhythm.

"This night in Beijing is still dim in the lights. Do you feel lonely?"

"After drinking this glass of wine, this glass of Erguotou, I am still drunk and thin. Are you crying?"

"I want to take you there. I have been to the beach without sunrise. You have to listen to the shouts I have left behind."

"I'll walk, walk, walk into the second ring road."

"I think about it, I can't imagine the warmth and coldness of this world."

"I ran and ran to the edge of this city."

"I only realized when I woke up, but the scenery here has not changed."

""

Interlude,

The end of the song.

I found Du Cheng was not singing because there was too much helplessness in his singing, and it also had a taste like the red star Erguotou, which was not the song he wrote, but every song he sang seemed to be his own song again.

This is not the first time I heard it, but this time I thought of myself.

I think that these Beijing drifters like me can also find themselves in Ducheng's songs? Now I am beginning to get lost in the dazzling neon lights, the prosperity of this city, and then on a drunken night, I ran all over the city under my feet to find myself, and the girl who said she wanted to float in this city with me.

Only after sobering up, will you find that the lost person cannot be found. It is within reach. There is only the blue sky that is not blue. What you breathe is different from your hometown, and it seems very heavy. Then you shake your head and devote yourself to the fast-paced life again. Because we are still young and in our twenties, we have not become alone and have no face to return home.

I smiled, and smiled in empathy.

Actually, I am not alone. At least, Du Cheng who sang on stage is like me, and the men and women who listened to him are like me, all in this city to survive and for a dream that is unwilling to wake up.

The loneliness of a group of people is not lonely, isn’t it?

Shaking my head, I walked to the booth not far from the platform, sat down, and Du Cheng jumped off the platform at this time and walked over.

"Why do you want to drink?"

"Just want to drink."

"Are you arguing?" Du Cheng touched his chin and pretended to analyze: "It's probably the case, otherwise why would you think of me if you don't stay with that woman for a long time?"

I shrugged and did not deny it.

"Maybe even more serious than the quarrel. I don't want to do it in Borui anymore, and I also filed for resignation with her today."

"Deadly self-esteem."

"It has nothing to do with self-esteem"

I hesitated for a moment, took out a cigarette, handed him one, and lit one on my own. The bored and familiar nicotine smell made me less sad.

"How to say it, it should be pressure." I didn't look at Du Cheng's expression and said to myself: "I can only watch my own woman. Facing those intrigues, I can't do anything, and I feel quite incompetent."

"So, you want to change?"

I nodded without saying anything.

"Mo'er, why do I think you are escaping?" Du Cheng took a deep breath of cigarette and sighed.
Chapter completed!